MLT Dating

As requested by listeners:

The Mean Lady Talking Podcast 

on Dating

 

 

 

Mean Lady Talking Dating Podcast

MLT Episode 4: Talking About Questions From The Questions Post, & The “Too Bad, So Sad” or Stupid Questions Mail Box

MLT Episode 9: Talking About Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway!!!!

MLT Episode 12: Talking About Mail. We Get Mail. Answering a Few Emails at One Time

MLT Episode 16: Talking About Listener Mail About Standards and Compatibility! This episode explains the GPYB concept of the “3 a.m. person"

MLT Episode 19: Male Stalking Victims

MLT Episode 20: Talking About Dating, Standards and Compatibility Inventory

MLT Episode 22: Talking About Dating and Self-Revelations, Standards and Fooling Ourselves

MLT Episode 24: Talking More About "Is This A Narcissist?"

MLT Episode 26: Talking About Honesty in On-Line Dating From Little White Lies to Full-Blown Catfishing! And 7 Rules to KEEP YOU SAFE!!!

MLT Episode 34 Part A: Talking about Listener Email with Two Long Podcsts

MLT Episode 34 Part B: Talking about Listener Email with Two Long Podcsts

MLT Episode 37: Talking About Dating

MLT Episode 38: Talking About Missing the Signs

MLT Episode 45: Tackles tough questions about relationships, life, love and loss.

MLT Episode 48 Part B: Codependency

MLT Episode 50 Part A: Getting Past Your Breakup Production

MLT Episode 50 Part B: Getting Past Your Breakup Production

MLT Episode 52: Talking about Physical Emotional Mental States

MLT Episode 54: Talking about Narcissistic Catfishes, Mirroring, Gaslighting Bullies

MLT Episode 55 A: Talking About Personality Disorders and Legal

MLT Episode 55 B: Talking About Personality Disorders and Legal

MLT Episode 57: Talking About Fear of Commitment and Fear of Intimacy

MLT Episode 58: Talking about No Contact, Gaslighting and Dating Burnout

MLT Episode 61: Talking About Boundaries, Standards, Limits and Love

MLT Episode 65: Talking About No BS Zone

MLT Episode 69: Time Frames and Standards

MLT Episode 72c: Talking About Recovering from Relationships with Narcissists

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MLT Grief and Loss, Attachment, Rejection & Grief Episodes

As requested by listeners:

The Mean Lady Talking Podcast 

Grief Episodes

and

Attachment Episodes

Dear Listeners:

These audios represent 25 years of research and field experience. 


If you find this content valuable,

please consider supporting the podcast through Patreon

so that the podcast can continue and other episodes will be produced.

Without support, the podcast will need to end. Thank you.


 

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MLT Podcast Attachment, Rejection & Grief Series

Show Notes

This episode kicks off the first of 3 (4 if you’re a Patreon supporter over 4.99)

on

Attachment, Rejection and Grief.

Show Notes with Times Coming Soon!

 

 

A 3 part series

(4 if you’re a Patreon supporter over 4.99)

on

Attachment, Rejection and Grief.

Show Notes with Times Coming Soon!

Do You Find This Content Valuable?

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Why Is It Called The Mean Lady Talking?

Episode 1: The Mean Lady Talking Podcast

Some of MLT's Best!

Episode 36a: The MLT Grief and Loss Series

Episode 59a: Attachment, Rejection & Grief Series

Episode 63a: Sick Relationships and Our Recovery From Them Part 1

Episode 39a: Narcissists, Sociopaths, Psychopaths and the Watts Family Murders Part 1

Episode 13: Personality Disorders and a Disordered Publication

Episode 56: Jealousy, Blaming and Gaslighting

Episode 1: Why Is It Named The Mean Lady Talking Podcast?

Episode 54a: Narcissists, Love Bombing, Mirroring and Catfishing Jerks

Episode 5: Shoulda Woulda Coulda - Grief, Guilt and Regret

The Mean Lady Talking is a GPYB Production

GPYB Books

GPYB Coaching and Counseling

GPYB Newsletter

The Getting Past Your Breakup Website

Mean Lady Talking Podcast Episode Number 36A Show Notes

 

Welcome to the Mean Lady Talking Podcast!

In this episode, we’re talking about

Grief and Loss Part 1 of 3

Show Notes and Player for Episode 36A

See below for links to listen and subscribe on your favorite platform:

iTunes, GooglePlay, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Spotify, TuneIn, iHeartRadio

(links to the show on all these platforms is below)

GO HERE FOR EPISODE 36B


 

What’s in this podcast:

Everything You’ve Ever Wanted To Know About Grief and Loss  

Times are Approximate

In this 3-part PODCAST we are talking about Grief and Loss Theory from Freud Forward

Telling the difference between the OBSESSION (unhealthy) and REVIEW & RELINQUISHMENT (healthy)


1:00-4:00 Techniques to get you out of the perseveration

5:00 The way we attach and detach has to do with early caregivers.

13:30 We’ve been doing this for ONE HUNDRED YEARS and we still don’t get it.

16:20 There are only THREE occasions we share with every other person on the face of the Earth and losing someone we love is ONE of them and we don’t talk about it.

19:30 We have to put up with so much of review and relinquishment of the movie in our head. But our emotions are what is HEALING us.

21:35 We have to get better at teaching people how to deal with loss and what grief should look like.

22:20 Back to Siggy and Karl and their exciting talk about mourning.

22:52 Freud originally believed that you had to relinquish the person COMPLETELY after they passed. He later changed to believe that we INTEGRATE the existence and relationship with the person instead of letting go completely.

24:00 Grief is a normal and natural response to loss. Even though it involves a “grave departure” from regular life,  it is not a malady.  Freud stated that you could grieve many other things besides the death of a loved one.

27:17 Grief is the painful, bit-by-bit letting go.  It is the struggle between wanting to hold on but needing to let go. Because the work is so difficult, people are inclined to delay, inhibit or stop the grief process.

28:50 Melancholia is a stifled, unimpassioned, drowsy grief. We feel bad and then we feel angry at ourselves for feeling as bad as we really feel.

30:00 Revisiting Freud’s changed position on relinquishing versus integration. You can integrate a lost love (who is still alive) into who you are and your experience.  You internalize the things you LIKED about the relationship or the person you were with.

32:00 When we do the internalization, we are able to go on with pleasant memories. When we’re still in pain, we’re not done yet.

33:20 Why grief does not happen in STAGES

34:00 When people think of “staging,” it screws them up when they repeat a phase.

34:25: Phases of Grief: Shock and Denial, Review and Relinquishment, Integration, Acceptance and Moving on. It’s much easier to DENY when it’s a breakup.

36:25: Is it unhealthy perseveration or is it necessary review?  If you have questions with no answers, you have to shut it down with distractions and mantras.  If you are doing the review, you have to let it happen even though it’s hard and hurts. 

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We Need Your Support To Continue!

 

Click Here to Become a Meanie Patreon Support and Receive Mentions and Bonus Episodes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The Mean Lady Talking is a GPYB Production

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GPYB Newsletter

The Getting Past Your Breakup Website